This week has been a hectic one. Even when I do get some evenings to myself there are usually so many things on my mind that I don't have the energy to do very much and just spend my time either playing Everquest (cos it's mindless to kill goblins) or to just sit and listen to music.

My mind is never really far away from school which is good and bad. All the things that have yet to be done are constantly in some corner of my mind somewhere and it makes me feel very unsettled. I guess I'm still new and inexperienced, which is why it is getting to me and almost everyone around me has been saying how I'm not as cheerful as I used to be, how I seem so preoccupied and lost at times. :(

I really don't like being this way. I don't get to talk to John very much these days, much less see him. And it makes me unhappy even though I know its due to work/school and it's part of life. Even if we're both too tired to really say much or to do anything substantial together, just being physically together makes a world of difference. John's so busy that sometimes this doesn't seem to matter much to him as there are 'more important' things to do. I don't blame him for thinking this way as he's definately much more practical in such things than me. But It makes me sad all the same.

I think I've yet to find some kind of balance in my life. I feel that all aspects of me are inter-related and they all affect me as a person while I know that for some people work is work and it doesn't affect any other area of their lives. Maybe I see things in a more... holistic/organic way.

Such gloomy thoughts for a Friday... it has just started pouring outside, really heavily. The weekend is almost here but yet I feel no joy. Must be PMS.

glittermissy @ 9:26 AM + + Permalink